“I finally understand this movie. … [It's] the kind of thing that Ed Wood would have directed if someone had handed him umpty-million dollars and not applied any direct adult supervision.”
~ W. H. Jamison, Jr.
Archive for quotations
review of Batman & Robin
use your own dirt
There was once a conjurer who boasted that he had become god-like. One god happened to overhear, and challenged him to a contest.
“Can you do this?” the god asked, scooping up a handful of dirt and making it into a bird. They watched the bird fly away.
“Sure,” said the conjure-man, and reached down for a handful of raw material.
“Hey,” said god. “Use your own dirt.”
modern high-quality tech support
“We all scratched our heads and glared threateningly at the machine for hours.”
~ John Charde
WHEEEEE! goes the economy
“When we were waiting in line, did you notice the sign saying ‘You must be this fucked to get on this ride’? “
~ fengi
explain
“There’s nothing like trying to explain something to someone else to make you think about the subject seriously and thoroughly yourself.”
~ Melodie Neal
differences
“Accept that other people see things differently to you, and have different requirements, and see what you can learn from those differences (actually, that may be the formula for world peace, so let’s just try a local implementation and see how we go).”
~ Melodie Neil
civilization of absurdity
“Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary.”
~ H.L. Mencken
very tempting
“Unless every other way we have to communicate has broken, I am not joining another Social Network.”
~ a friend of Alec Saunders
Floccinaucinihilipilification
“I loved him for nothing so much as his flocci-nauci-nihili-pili-fication of money.”
~ William Shenstone
[from Wikipedia]
everyone is now dumber
“Mr. Madison, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.”
~ principal (played by James Downey) in Billy Madison, written by Tim Herlihy & Adam Sandler
