“I finally understand this movie. … [It's] the kind of thing that Ed Wood would have directed if someone had handed him umpty-million dollars and not applied any direct adult supervision.”
~ W. H. Jamison, Jr.

There was once a conjurer who boasted that he had become god-like. One god happened to overhear, and challenged him to a contest.

“Can you do this?” the god asked, scooping up a handful of dirt and making it into a bird. They watched the bird fly away.

“Sure,” said the conjure-man, and reached down for a handful of raw material.

“Hey,” said god. “Use your own dirt.”

[found: Making Light: "Fanfic": force of nature]

“We all scratched our heads and glared threateningly at the machine for hours.”

~ John Charde

“When we were waiting in line, did you notice the sign saying ‘You must be this fucked to get on this ride’? “
~ fengi

proprioception
the sense of body position

[external formal definition: proprioception - Wiktionary]

“There’s nothing like trying to explain something to someone else to make you think about the subject seriously and thoroughly yourself.”
~ Melodie Neal

“Accept that other people see things differently to you, and have different requirements, and see what you can learn from those differences (actually, that may be the formula for world peace, so let’s just try a local implementation and see how we go).”
~ Melodie Neil

“Civilization, in fact, grows more and more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary.”
~ H.L. Mencken

[via The Airport Security Follies - New York Times]

“Unless every other way we have to communicate has broken, I am not joining another Social Network.”

~ a friend of Alec Saunders

“I loved him for nothing so much as his flocci-nauci-nihili-pili-fication of money.”

~ William Shenstone

[from Wikipedia]